Christmas is for kids! Well isn’t that a lie!
Yes, we said it! For all of you parents who say; “We don’t need to get each other anything, Christmas is for kids.” We want to encourage you to change your perspective.
Why Exchanging Gifts At Christmas Matters
During times of financial challenge, we thought the same thing. It was much easier on the budget to skip “us” and do whatever we could for the kids.
We probably did this for a few years and then one year when we shared this with our mentors. It was at that moment when they lovingly corrected us.
As we’ve previously shared, it was our mentors who taught us the priorities of God. And with that understanding, they explained to us that when we decide to skip “us” for Christmas, what we are demonstrating to the kids is that, when they become parents, their wants and desires no longer matter.
The mindset of skipping “us” wasn’t new. When Timberley was a single mom raising Brandon, Christmas would be focused around him.
One Christmas Brandon cried telling Timberley, Santa didn’t bring mommy anything. The next year Timberley was sure to buy and wrap at least one gift that was under the tree for herself.
Once we were married, when money was tight, we quickly reverted back to that same habit by eliminating gifts for “us.”
Two different scenarios but they both displayed the same message. When we became aware of the message we were sending, we quickly changed it.
The Principle Of Exchanging Gifts At Christmas
Yes, something as simple as gift-giving can send the right message. For those who may be wondering, how do you do this when you simply do not have extra money for gifts?
Here are a few tips our mentors gave us. Purpose to give each other 3 gifts that represent their: spirit, soul, and body.
We would give a gift that helped strengthen our spirit, such as; a book, a devotional, or anything that would strengthen our relationship with God.
For our soul, we would give each other; music, write a about our love for one another in a card, give our favorite candy, or food. And for our body, we would give something to wear; perfume, clothes, hats, socks, or jewelry, etc.
If you really want to spice it up without spending any more money, make little fun tags that say to my wife for your spirit, to my husband for your soul, or to my wife for your body.
This type of giving displays love, and unity within the marriage and shows the children that parents matter, even on Christmas.
Being Intentional With Exchanging Gifts
This concept worked well for us, for a few years. Until we studied how purposeful and intentional the wise men were with the gifts they brought Christ.
We weren’t too far off, but understanding why the wise men brought gifts of gold, frankincense and myrrh, definitely changed our perspective about exchanging gifts at Christmas.
But this time, God was convicting our hearts to be more intentional in our giving and not just with us. This was going to change the way we give to family and friends going forward.
You can read more about our study on this from the blog: How to give the gift of gold, frankincense and myrrh.
When we changed our perspective about exchanging gifts at Christmas, God met us right where we were.
Then, as we made gift giving between us a priority, God revealed fresh revelation on how to give better.
Setting The Example
Too many spouses have set the wrong example after getting married. Some women have stopped dressing nice, doing their hair or wearing make up for their spouses.
Unfortunately, that teaches the young girls that when they get married, they don’t have to take care of themselves anymore.
Men are no different. Some men stop taking care of their physical bodies. Which teaches the young men that once they become a husband or a father, keeping up with their physical body is no longer important.
Simply put, as a parent or spouse, we don’t do the same things we did before having kids. As if we don’t matter because all that matters right now are the children.
The truth is, we matter even more, because we are raising Godly future husbands and wives; fathers and mothers.
In The End
Titus 2 tells us to train the younger generation and exchanging gifts at Christmas is no different.
Whether you’re raising a family together or as a single parent, purchasing a gift for yourself or each other is just as important as purchasing a gift for your children.
So we ask you, how will you sow into yourself or your spouse this Christmas?
~ André and Timberley Gray