What If We Were Measured By Our Failure Instead Of Our Success?

What if we were measured by our failures instead of our success? Would that help us overcome not feeling like a failure in life?

We didn’t give that any thought until we were asked to share a recent failure.

Our Failure To Success Story

Coming up with a failure we would be proud of took much thought. That process alone, showed us that it was through our failures that we grew closer to God, and found new success!

If you read the about section of our blog,  you would know that as a former real estate agent and mortgage broker, when the market crashed so did our finances.

We cannot begin to describe the heartache we experienced during that time. As we thought to ourselves how could this happen to us; we’re in the business?

How will this look to our clients, our friends, and our family? Most importantly, how will our children view our failure in business?

That alone was enough to make us feel like a failure in life!

We spent over a year trying to maintain our status quo. Getting our hustle on was an understatement, and it just wasn’t enough.

Prior to real estate, Timberley was in the financial industry so with her knowledge, we made wise investment choices that allowed us to float for about a year.

With no new business, consequently, we were faced with bankruptcy, and as a result we lost our home.  It was a tough pill to swallow for someone in our position.

Losing Our Home

We’ve never lost a house before as we’ve owned several. But this home wasn’t any ordinary house.

This house we chose to make our home.

We invested thousands of dollars into it. It was our dream home 3200 square foot single story on a ½ acre lot with; a swimming pool, basketball court, playground, plantation shutters, travertine, and more.

You name it, we had it. However, when it came down to the final straw, none of it mattered. Our house was underwater in value. All our savings and investments were drained.

Now it was time to admit to our children we had failed in business, and we needed to give up our home.

The night we sat our kids down to talk with them. We remember so clearly as if it happened yesterday.

Trying to explain to our 5 and 12-year-old at the time, our line of work, how our business was effected and we needed to move, was not easy.

To our surprise, the kids not only supported our decision to move, they understood!

We’ve shared the details of that conversation in a previous blog; Does Your Downgrade Look Like An Upgrade? By the name of the title, you can guess our outcome.

When we hit rock bottom, we sought God more than ever. He literally became the air we breathed.

It was then, we learned to prioritize God more than our business or work. We learned that it wasn’t enough to know financial principles from the world’s perspective.

Learning kingdom finances and what it meant to be good stewards became vital!

It was only after applying those principles, that we could learn from those failures and try again.

“I have not failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
~ Thomas Edison

Our Redemptive Failure Story

After renting a home for 3 years, seeking God, and making lifestyle changes, God restored unto us all that was lost.

We bought another home with similar upgrades to the home we previously lost.

The best part about this story took place a few years later, when our son sent us a text message at 3:21 a.m. that said: “Just wanted to say I love you guys!”

Looking at the time, we were thinking, what was this boy doing at 3 a.m.? What did he watch, do, or was about to get into, that made him have a moment to think of his parents?

So we did what any parent would do; we asked him what that was all about?

He explained that a few days ago, he took our daughter with him to drive around and look at all the houses we’ve lived in as a family. They talked about what was happening in our lives at each house.

He went on to say that he was thinking about the different seasons we were in as a family. As he was driving home from the gym, he reflected on how much we’ve come through; and just felt like telling us how much he loves us.

Now how about that for feeling like a failure in life?

Walking Through The Failure

In our children’s eyes, they noticed there were moments of our lives as a family where we grew, where we changed, and memories were created that they appreciated.

It isn’t always the failures that impact our children. It’s how we deal with the failures.

During that time, we remember meeting with an attorney who told us we were not his “typical” client.

Those words may not have seemed comforting at the moment. However, those words spoke to the way we handled, what seemingly was a failure.

In The End

There are some situations in life that you cannot control, which means the outcome may not be what you expected. However, through Christ, you can do all things!

“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”
~ Philippians 4:13 (KJV)

When we choose to go to God with humility, and brokenness, He will grant us wisdom, favor, blessings and peace!

Losing all we had wasn’t a loss at all!

In reality, we gained a new perspective in our relationship with; God, each other, and how to manage kingdom finances. More importantly, the example we set with our children walking through difficult times.

“Let us then fearlessly and confidently and boldly draw near to the throne of grace (the throne of God’s unmerited favor to us sinners), that we may receive mercy [for our failures] and find grace to help in good time for every need [appropriate help and well-timed help, coming just when we need it].”
~Hebrews 4:16(AMPC)

The blessings that come from honoring God in the process, was and continues to be priceless.

How about you? What failure has led you to success?

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~ Andre and Timberley Gray