Ladies, if you feel like taking time for yourself regularly is selfish, I’ve got news for you. It’s not. Whether you’re single, married, a mother, grandmother, friend, sister, pastor, or whatever you want to call it; if you’re a woman, you have a need for some “me” time.
Women are naturally nurturers and care givers. We have an instinct for wanting to take care of others. However, far too many times, we end up sacrificing ourselves for the sake of others. And ultimately it leads to exhaustion, resentment, and self-pity.
I learned later on in life, that taking care of me is actually biblical not selfish. Let me be clear. I HAVE NOT mastered this, as I’m still a work in progress. However, over the years, I’ve found a few ways to make time for myself on a regular basis without feeling guilty.
1. Wake-Up A Little Earlier
Yeah, that doesn’t sound too fair. Why should we get less sleep just to have time for ourselves? Well, this has taught me to go to bed earlier, so that I can wake up refreshed.
When I get up early I’m able to spend time with God first. It rejuvenates my heart, and mind so that I can be fully equipped for the task at hand during the day.
I love getting up early when the house is quite, with a cup of coffee and spending my morning talking to God in my war room. The peace I feel as I sit in my chair in my family room, reading God’s Word, and writing in my journal. Being still in the silence, so I can hear God speak back to me.
Experiencing this kind of peace is difficult when everyone is awake, making noises and carrying on, it’s a distraction. I can’t always get up before everyone, but I do strive for early-morning time just for me and God so that I can get spiritually fit for the day.
When I do this, if really does set my tone for the rest of the day. I am more peaceful, and gracious towards others.
She rises while it is yet night and gets [spiritual] food for her household and assigns her maids their tasks. ~ Proverbs 31:15 (AMPC)
2. Schedule Days To Take Care Of Your Body
This is a tough one for many of us women. We know we should exercise, and we know we should eat better. However, our schedules tend to get the best of us. It’s easy to get so tied up with doing everything; we skip meals, trying to survive on coffee and adrenaline.
I stopped doing that a long time ago when I kept passing out because of having low blood sugar.
As a result, I literally had to start writing in my planner the days and times I will do some form of physical activity. I schedule time for my manicure or pedicure that I do myself, and the days I allocate for skin care or massages, etc.
Taking care of our bodies (the temple in which the Holy Spirit lives) is biblical. We don’t have a problem scheduling last minute things for our family and friends, so why can’t we schedule time for ourselves?
Women, we are multi-taskers. We do a lot, and we set ourselves up to accomplish the impossible. If our bodies are worn down, we won’t be around to do much. Therefore, we must take the necessary steps to take care of ourselves. This includes physical exercise, taking care of our skin, what we eat, etc.
There are times I’ve gone as far as logging my water intake in my bullet journal (Bullet journaling that’s another post for another time. I’m still trying to get the hang of it, but so far I love it!) The point is, when I actually schedule taking care of my temple, it gets done!
1 Corinthians 16:19-20 (AMPC) says: Do you not know that your body is the temple (the very sanctuary) of the Holy Spirit Who lives within you, Whom you have received [as a Gift] from God? You are not your own, 20 You were bought with a price [purchased with a preciousness and paid for, made His own]. So then, honor God and bring glory to Him in your body.
Since we are women of God, we should prioritize taking care of our bodies so that we can do all of what God has placed on our hearts to do.
3. Give Yourself Grace to Say No To The Good
Sometimes we have to simply say no to the good. I learned this from my mentor. It was very hard for me to do at first. But as I practiced it, it became easier and easier.
Say no to the good for the sake of the better!
I’ve learned to screen my calls instead of answering every call. That’s what voicemail is for. If it’s important, they will leave a message. Then I can return the calls when I’m done prioritizing God, my family and myself!
This concept applies to everything even in cleaning. I’ve learned that is’ ok if I skip a day of dusting. The dust will be there tomorrow.
If my schedule is full with appointments, work, the kids, church commitments, and I need to clean something the same day; by order of priority, I may need to take a few minutes for myself to regroup instead of cleaning. As a result, reschedule the cleaning for the next day.
Living a life within the priorities of God, is all about balance and making time for what matters most. We all know that God is important, our families are important. However, so is our well-being; our complete well-being spirit, soul and body.
So be sure to include ways to rejuvenate your spirit, soul and body when you take time for yourself. Whatever that looks like to you; as we are all uniquely different. Just do what makes you happy. What helps re-charge you; what helps strengthen you to be the best version of you for God and your family.
Just do it girl!
Do you have another suggestion for taking time for yourself without feeling guilty? Share it in the comments.
~ Timberley Gray
Misty Phillip says
Timber let, this post is full of so much wisdom. As a young married mom I thought if I took me time that I was buying into the world’s lie about “me “. So instead, I ran myself ragged until I was completely burned out!! I have learned to put border and margins in my life by applying some of the very same principles that you shared here. I can’t pour myself out to anyone in service, if I am empty. Great post! Thanks for sharing. ❤️ Misty
Thank you Misty for sharing your story. I know there are many mothers who felt or still feel the same way you did. It’s amazing to see how God meets us right where you are and grows us so that we can help others. ~ Blessings